What I didn't write on my summer scholarship application
- I want to write better.
- I want to be better.
- I want to think that learning from this program is going to make me feel better.
- I want to spend 7 days appreciating something that has nothing to do with making money.
- I want to put more words on my writing resume that so far only has projects endorsed by me.
- I want to feel endorsed by someone else.
- I want to give my parents more tangible reasons to feel proud of their daughter who is a graduate of a career she didn't like and is now in another country working as a waitress.
- I want to feel like I accomplished something.
- I want to uphold the name of a city I don't want to return to.
- I want to have reasons not to return.
- I want to have tasks to forget that my city is the most violent city in the world per capita for the second year in a row.
- I want to have excuses not to confess that I do miss a city that doesn't miss me.
- I want to write about something other than my world.
- I want to stop living in my world.
- I want to feel capable of accomplishing something.
- I want to distract myself.
- I want to distinguish my life from reality.
- Please.
- I don't want to give pity with my story but I want to keep telling it but I'm afraid of tiring the same people who have heard me cry about the same issues for 5 months now.
- I want to convince my parents that I am going to accomplish something. Maybe then, I will be convinced of the same thing.
- I want to convince my brother that I am better off. Maybe then, I will convince myself of the same thing.
- I want to inspire my friends.
- I want the downside of my life to stop being the best thing for the internet.
- I want to stay here for hours.
- I want to write a novel without all the main characters having my voice or my pain, but if I don't write it, will it be worth it?
- I want to feel competent.
- I want to understand what it is to deserve. I want to accept that wanting is not enough.
- I don't want to keep looking for courses on coursera.
- I want to live something different.
- I want to live again.
